Shopping with The Noodle this morning and I brushed arses with an elderly lady at the checkout.

'Thought it was my lucky day there,' she said.

'Me too,' I replied.

Then we both looked embarrassed for a bit and she lurched away with her shopping.

I swear I have a type of Aspergers that doesn't come with the prodigious mathematical skills, just an ability to say precisely the wrong thing in any given social situation.