Pagan Accountants

Whether you describe it as a credit to the progress of man or decry it as the loss of spirituality and closeness to nature; the fact is that most of us are mostly removed from the shift in season and the vagaries of weather.

I think it's a good thing. I wouldn't fancy spending the entire winter cloistered up with a herd of goats, forced to burn dung to defrost salted herring and melt icicles from my wife's beard.

What we have lost, however, is a genuine cause for celebration. Okay apart from New Years Eve, Christmas and Easter; well the latter two aren't for everybody, are they?

Where's our midwinter feast? Solstice, Equinox, chanting monks?

I'll tell you.

(drum roll)

End of financial year.

Our work is finished, now the beans must be counted and a symbolic tithe offered up to the gods of taxation in the hope that it please them and they reward their humble servants with an extra large return and a reduction in medicare levy.

There should be days off, feasting, pageantry, bonhomie and packs of shit faced accountants throwing up in taxis and getting it on with each other in massive, bacchanalian orgies on the piled heaps of the years paperwork.

File it away, a little sticky and worse for wear, and begin the new financial year with the sun on your face and the wind in your hair.