He Just Gives Them Away?

We have made the mistake of introducing the concept of Santa to the Noodle. One of his cousins was over the other day and had a toy car that Noodle wanted, really quite badly.

In order to placate his infantile tirade upon the eventual departure of cousin and car, Knickers told him that Santa might bring him one for Christmas.

You could see his mind ticking over.

'Santa?'

'Yes, you can sit on his lap and tell him what you want and he will get if for you; provided you're a good boy.'

I'll paraphrase his response here - 'So, ignoring the whole being a good boy rubbish, what you're basically saying is that I sit on this bloke's lap, tell him I want a car, and then I get it?'

'Er, yes.'

'Brilliant. Done. Where is he then, c'mon, chop bloody chop.'

So we've been trying to explain ever since that he will get it on Christmas. Occasionally we add that he has to be good as well, but everyone silently acknowledges that this is a waste of breath.

Santa will be in real trouble if the Noodle does meet him and the jolly man fails to produce said car on the spot. His saving grace might be if Noodle repeats last year's performance; freaking out and legging it at the first sight of the man in red pyjamas.

Until then we will just have to deal with, 'I sit on Santa's lap. I get the presents.' forty times a day.