Friday, May 9, 2008

The Loneliest Dad

It's a modern world. Australia is, slowly, moving towards equality for same sex couples. The USA may be about to see its first female or African American President. My dad is thinking about buying a microwave.

Just don't tell the Stepford wives at Mitcham Playgroup.

We've been taking the Noodle there for a few months now, Knickers mostly but me if she's working, and every time I go I get shown a shoulder that's colder than a well digger's arse.

The Unley wannabes raise their manicured eyebrows (the only emaciated features on their overfed bodies) and hustle their Fred Bare clad offspring away from the unshaven man like I'm a barbarian invading the inner sanctum of Acca Larentia.

So I make myself a mug of tea and follow the Noodle about for an hour and a half as he pursues his own solitary entertainment. At the end they have a singing session. He is still a little reluctant to join the other kids on the mat so he sits on my lap and helps me do the actions. Then we pack away our chair, take off our name tags and go home. It is really bizarre.

Surely other dads go to playgroups? I hardly think I'm a pioneer in the brave new of shared parenting. Surely the odd, 'Hello' isn't too much to ask?

I'd stop going, but we've paid for the half year, and the tea is free.



At May 9, 2008 at 10:35 PM , Blogger wiretherapy said...

you need to work 'my same sex partner will be joining us later' into the conversation.

should you ever have one.

conversation i mean.

hmm. awkward.

At May 10, 2008 at 3:14 PM , Blogger squib said...

You should try another playgroup (I don't know about over there but here the fee you pay covers you for whatever playgroup you go to that belongs to the association)

In my playgroup days there were always a couple of blokes and they were treated warmly

Try breaking the ice by talking about your 'birth experience'

At May 11, 2008 at 5:22 PM , Blogger franzy said...

I have noticed similar things happening in the morning swim group that used to pounce on my head when i went for laps at the Norwood pool. All the mums got to laugh and have fun and the dad with all the tatts had to stand to one side, quietly flexing, while they all compared stretch marks.
I also have a very hairy mate (not so many tatts) who also experiences a bit of outsider syndrome at his own son's playgroup.
Maybe give the Noodle a large mock butcher's knife (the kind circus jugglers use) and push him towards their darling little spores. That should at least start a conversation...

At May 13, 2008 at 8:53 PM , Blogger myninjacockle said...

well yes, a deranged, militantly gay, unnervingly birth obsessed father of a homicidal toddler would indeed attract some conversation. Of the 'leave now or I'm calling the police' kind.


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